Your co-worker tells you he has eight body piercings - none are visible. When someone says "TENDERLOIN", you don't think steak; you think danger. You make well over $100,000 and you still can't find a nice place to live. You think anyone who drives a car to work is decadent. You keep a list of companies to boycott. You would never dream of crossing a picket line. You take the bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a conversation in English. You realize there are far more Rainbow flags in the city than the California State flag. The guy who cuts your hair is straight, and your plumber is gay. The woman who delivers your mail is straight, and your Mary Kay Lady is gay. Old friends you haven't talked to in years suddenly call. "Do you have a spare bedroom for a weekend?" You think anyone wearing a George Clooney haircut is visiting from the Midwest. You can't remember...Is pot still illegal? You go to your office manager's baby shower. The parents are named Judy and Becky. You give a "thumbs up" gesture to a car with a FREE TIBET bumper sticker and you mean it. You have a very strong opinion where your coffee beans are grown, and are willing to fight about it. A really great parking spot can move you to tears. You know that anyone wearing shorts in June is just visiting from Ohio. A man walks on MUNI in full leather regalia and crotchless chaps. You don't notice. You curse those damn tourists - but always stop to help a cute person who is looking puzzled at a city map. When you drive under an underpass, for one moment you think "earthquake". Your boss runs in "The Bay to Breakers" ...it's the first time you have seen him nude. Your child's 3rd grade teacher has a nose ring and is named "Breeze". You haven't been to Fisherman's Wharf since the first month you moved to the Bay Area. You are thinking of taking an adult education class, but you can't decide between a Yoga, Channeling or Building Your Web Site class. Your new neighbors go to temple, but you are still not sure if they are Jewish or Buddhist. You realize the only Republicans you know are your Aunt and Uncle in Georgia.